Amazon is indisputably the largest online shopping site in the world. There is nothing that you can’t find at Amazon. Their swift service is even more tempting for us. In my free time, I sometimes like surfing through amazon, the USA website(I know it sounds like a weird pastime, but think of it like window shopping). They have some very cool things, but what I really look to find is the weird as shit things that you wouldn’t believe even exists.
So I took screenshots of all those weird things and thought of sharing with you guys. I hope you laugh as much as I did.
1. Fake Poop
Even in the year 2018, people are buying such stuff. I agree this used to be a fun prank once upon a time, but I’d hoped that newer better pranks had been invented. Also, this is disgusting! Even real poop doesn’t look so real. This shit(literally) costs $5.99(around Rs 382)
2. Gift Of Nothing
Remember that time you asked your friend what she wants for her birthday and she humbly said nothing? Well we found ‘nothing’ for you. It is like the Somebody, Nobody and Mad joke. It goes like:
“There were three people: Somebody, Nobody and Mad. So one day, Mad called the police and reported ‘Sir! Somebody killed Nobody’. The confused police replies, ‘Are you mad?’. To which Mad replied,’Ofcourse I’m Mad’.” Haha.. Okay maybe that didn’t make so much of sense.
Price: $6.92 (approx Rs 440)
3. Donald Trump Toilet Paper
How is this even legal in USA? Remember how an IAS Officer had received notice from the State Government of Chattisgarh for wearing sunglasses(on a sunny day) while receiving Modi? Well, maybe its time for India to calm down as there are worse in this world. Besides, how weird is it to see smiling faces out of your toilet paper while you shit. It is disconcerting.
Price: $9.97(approx. Rs.635)
4. Bullshit Button
This, I need. It would be so cool if I didn’t have to say the word and the button would do the job. It reeks of power. The power to not take any more bullshit.
Price: $8.06 (approx. Rs.513)
5. British Accent Mouthspray
“Sound Richer, Sound Smarter, Even LOOK More Attractive” is what they’re promising. If this thing worked, I’d spray this on half the population of this planet and on myself, because well, frankly the British accent is sexy.
Price: $7.20 (approx. Rs.446)
6. USB Fridge
This is actually genius. There are times I open a soda and can’t finish it. This mini-fridge would keep it cold and I would not have to walk to the fridge all the time, anymore. The perfect way to get fat.
Price: $38 (approx. Rs.2419)
7. Toilet Mug
I cannot believe that I got two toilets in one post. This disgusting cup just ruined coffee for me.
Price: $12.99 (approx. Rs.827 )
8. Liquid Ass
They have bottled the fart smell and are selling it for almost 1000 bucks. I have literally seen everything in my life now. Its time to go. *falls off a cliff*
Price: $12.95 (approx. Rs.824 )
9. Monkey Poo
I am not sure what you’re supposed to do with it, but you can buy a combo of Monkey Poo, Gorilla Poo and Giraffe Poo at a steal price of $14.97!
Price: $4.99 (approx. Rs.317 )
10. Unicorn Meat
I’ve read in the Harry Potter books that Unicorn blood could give immortality. Never could find an unicorn though. Finally I was able to track down some Unicorn meat.
Siri:”How may I help you?”
Me:”Remind me to call J.K Rowling first thing tomorrow morning to ask her what Unicorn meat does.”
Price: $12.18 (approx. Rs.775 )
11. Dehydrated Water
Dehydrated Water. Just Add Some Water. *pronounced brain dead*
Price: $10.99 (approx. Rs.699 )
12. Creamed Possum
Price: $6.49 (approx. Rs.413 )
13. Yodelling Pickle
Their ad on Amazon says: ‘Are you sick and tired of trying to teach your pickles to yodel? Pickles can be so stubborn. At last, the yodeling pickle you’ve been waiting for. With a mere press of a button (yes, it has a button) this little pickle will yodel its heart out. You’ll think you’re in the Swiss Alps listening to a yodeling pickle.’
Price: $11.22 (approx Rs.714)
le Me: *loses faith in the world*