comedy questions on Quora

Quora is a well-known site which basically has questions and answers. While Quora is an informational site, some clowns would always make you laugh. Quora has a lot of annoying people who know how to make you tick. From people who respond but do not answer the question to people who ask questions like “What is the full form of NASA” when you could just type the same damn thing and find the answer on Google, Quora has them all. Let’s check out a few hilarious questions asked on Quora that I have tried to answer aptly:

1.

While I do not understand how corruption and chicken salad are related.
Answer: Salads are good. Chicken salads are better. People who are corrupt could not probably take that much good. Its like Voldemort and Harry Potter. ‘One cannot live while the other survives’.
Or something like that.

2.

Seriously, is that even possible?
Answer: It is pretty simple to handle 10 boyfriends. Build a roster for each boyfriend and get a different cell phone with cell numbers separately for each guy. You have to be as fake as you and build up on your lying skills. It is very important that you remember each one’s name correctly. All the best!

3.

Of all the super-powers to choose from, this is what he came up with?
Answer: Huh. Tough choice. The ability to grow fingernails pretty fast would make you almost as powerful as the Wolverine; without the healing, beard, adamantium or awesomeness. On the other hand, the ability to transform into a reclining chair could save you from having to go to the super market when your mother demands it; also you would probably be stationed infront of a TV, forever. I think, I’d go with recliner chair.

4.

Ok. Those are odd things to be hit one. Fatal even.
Answer: The shovel would be fine. The world does not need more people who could ask such questions.

5.

Why does this question exist? Why? But WHY?
Answer: Silverfish is known to have a diet containing polysaccharides. They like eating glue, fabrics, sugar, paper etc. Basically, they are attracted to anything that is dry. So unless you wanked off on your study table or living room carpet, you have nothing to worry about.

6.

Heard? Where?
Answer: Sure. Did you also hear that in the Middle Ages, wives of noble men would comb their hair with ape paws and the children would play with giraffe tails? Did you?

7.

Even conspiracy theorists do not fall as far from logic as this one did.
Answer: The government can read thoughts of people all over the world. The aluminium foil hat, a.k.a the aluminium foil hat, is used to hide the heads of the half-witted such as yourself to save them from the impending mind reading by insulating your intellect in your own head so that it does not reflect back in and does not hit poor souls like us.

8.

Oh Lord. *feminist inside me rises*
Answer: Change your wife. Also what does innocent have to do with being sexy? One is the mind, the other is looks. Its time you started distinguishing between the two, son.

9.

Aaaand another one.*eye roll*
Answer: So basically, you want to compare your career vs your wife’s belly. Ask her for nudes. Get slapped hard. The harder she slaps, the thinner her belly.

10.

Answer: Oh lets see, apparently never in your sight. Otherwise you’d know.

11.

Is this a trick question?
Answer: I travelled on a plane a couple of times. It never flew while landing. Never.

12.

I am not sure why he doesn’t try to ask her out.
Answer: Sure. The same could also be achieved if you spit on her bed.

13.

Racist much?
Answer: No. Muslims are prohibited to use VoLTE.

14.

I was so impressed by the answer on Quora. It says:
Answer: Perhaps you paper ripped? Ah! It happens my friend. Life is unfair, people suffer for no reason at all. Especially with toilet paper. Companies these days don’t want to put the effort or money in to make good toilet paper. Most toilet paper just feel like sandpaper on my tushie, I can’t take it anymore. There needs to be a revolution of toilet paper that is rip-proof. No more shit on my hands, no more rough anus, that is a good life.
Seriously bro.

15.

Illiteracy is a growing disease.
Answer: No. But coitus during pregnancy may make a single baby into twins.

16.

Quorans. He almost asked it as if they were a different species.
Answer: Err… I’m not sure. But I guess they would have skin just like other humans.

17.

What. A. Creep.
Answer: Yes they do. You have to understand their language. Also note that the animal language can be admitted to court as evidence when you are charged because sexual relations with animals is a punishable offence.

18.

Another great answer on quora.
Answer(as written on quora): Frankly I do it because it feels better. You are free to test alternatives. Perhaps your posterior looks more like a wild animal’s, or even like a dog’s. Diaper rash could be a side-effect. Ask your mother whether you have a bad case of it before you let the test run too long.

19.

Which country does this dummy belong to?
Answer: Not that I am aware of. Though using the toilet may prove to be more convenient than squatting on the floor or wearing an adult diaper.

20.

I am tempted to write ‘Do Not Try This At Home’.

Answer: I do not have past experiences of boiling heads but I do make a mean boiled egg. Eggs when boiled taste so much better. Maybe boiling your head may make it more intelligent. Maybe.

Hey. I am Sagarika. I hail from the City of Joy. Though I have graduated as an engineer, writing has always been my calling. What had started as a weird Paragraph at an essay writing competition, has now turned into an all time passion for me. Though the entire world is my muse, dogs are my favourite form of life.

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