I was alone and I started learning..
Every kid wants to grow up. As a kid, I never really grasped the concept of enjoying childhood. No one takes you seriously, no one really takes your advice; there are movies you aren’t allowed to watch, neither can you drive a car and most annoying of all, you don’t have any money to spend around at your whims. But who knew, after I’d grow up I’d miss my childhood days.
First off, the whole business of adulthood is a hoax. You’re still not taken seriously, instead you are taken for granted. You can watch those A-rated movies, but do we really have the time to take out of this rat race? Ofcourse you can finally drive. You have a license, but ironically, you do not have a car. And finally, you’re still as broke as you’ll ever be.
Moving out of my parents’ house was very gratifying but it made me miserable at the same time. After 4 years on my own, I decided to make a list of things that I learnt about living alone for all those who are too excited or too scared to take the step out of your parents’ porch.
1. The most difficult part of living alone is probably waking up in the morning. It used to be easy when maa used to jolt me awake in the mornings. My school uniform ironed laid out for me. Food already on the table. Bath water heated and backpack ready near the door.
2. Hunger is not something I was acclimated with. While I loved cooking, it was only a stress-buster, and I never really understood why mothers used to find it a necessary nuisance. Now I do. Making the occasional pudding and pasta was alright, but it turned into a hassle when I had to cook after a hard day at work or college. There has been countless dinners which consisted of only boiled eggs and bananas. No kidding!
3. Haggling for money with autowalas is a way of life now. And I absolutely despise it. There are the times I want to call up my dad and thank him for all the times he drove me to my destination without a word of complaint.
4. I love shopping. But transactions with the vegetable vendor is absolutely tiring. I truly understood the weight that 1 kilo can impose on you. And it is not even funny how all the ration had to be replenished every other day. Like seriously? Did we just eat all the potatoes?
5. Back home, the house seemed to clean itself; almost magically. I always told my mother that she had OCD. Only, now I know what happens to the house if atleast one person doesn’t have it. Mess is a small word. Wreckage, clutter, confusion, hodgepodge and chaos together wouldn’t be able to cover what goes on in the house.
6. The tube light in my room does not work. Seriously, I just have to change the CFL light tube. But it has been like this since forever. Back home, I’d grumble and pout until everything in my room is perfect. Grumbling doesn’t feel the same when its directed to myself.
7. Having an argument with the flatmates is never like having an argument with parents. Even though it is easier to win an argument when you live alone; I’ve realized that it does not fade out easily. Arguments with my mother would end the moment she brought me food. It used to be easier. Your parents would never let you sulk for long.
8. Though making plans with friends is easier once I started living alone, I hate having to think if I had enough bucks on my for that buffet I wanted to go for ages. I truly understood the value of money.
9. There are too many people in my generation who have swayed and fallen into the wrong path. Though parents are always there to guide you through out your life, I have seen what peer pressure could bring you down to. All of us have tried the occasional cigarette or gone out to booze, what is to stop us from regular addiction? Holding firm with your values is easier said than done without your parents looking down upon you at all times.
10. But, to those who are scared of all of the above things that make living alone gargantuan, it definitely is worth it. I understand the feeling of dread when you realize that you will not be seeing your mom or dad on an everyday basis. How they wouldn’t be around to hug your worries away or to wipe your tears or to help you sleep after you’ve seen a horror movie; all of that is very difficult. But living alone, I believe, makes you a strong nut. Independence is not when you start earning, independence is when you can do everything on your own. Independence is also helping out your parents; and you would never be able to do that if you are still super-dependant on them.
Using ‘I love my parents too much’ as an excuse to not live alone is daft. Living away from them does not affect your love for your parents. Neither will it affect their love for you. Let me tell you, running towards your mother at the airport is the best feeling I have in the four years that I have lived away from her. This time makes me want to thank them for everything that they have done for me and apologize for everything that I haven’t taken notice of.
I think it is necessary for everyone to live without their parents, even if it is for a short period of time. This is the time that you truly learn about yourself and bring out everything that you are capable of beyond doubt.